Update

Yesterday was my appointment to see my surgeon. I pretty much haven't disclosed my situation to my family. As I was getting ready for my appointment my sister called and asked if I were getting ready for work. I had to tell her where I was going and the ironic thing was that she was going to Dana Farber too and seeing the same doctor for a follow-up! Things happen the way they were meant to be!

Beth (my Surgeon) was able to feel what I was feeling. She thinks it may be a lymph node but can't be certain. I already had a CT scan scheduled for today and an appointment with my Oncologist next week. She would like for me to also have a PET scan done and is contacting my Onc to set it up. So for now it's another waiting game and I am OK with that. A week or two isn't going to break me. I've been losing too much sleep as it is and it can't get any worse. I am very accustomed to living on adrenaline even though I look like I have 2 black eyes and basically look like crap. lol

On to other things. Casey made the travel basketball team. They have been practicing 2x a week and her first game is next weekend. Some of the games are way out there! Between her and Justin, who's games are always out there, I am going to have to find another source of fuel for my van.

Justin's youth hockey team is doing pretty well. His team was bumped up a level so now the competition is going to be tougher. He has also tried out for High School hockey and will being playing JV in addition.

That's all for now~

Wendy

Where I'm at

I haven't felt this ALONE in years.

Lurking Demons

The demons which normally live hidden in my subconscious are infiltrating into my conscious. Something is wrong. I feel it. I've felt it for many months but I pushed it out of my mind. But now they flood my dreams. This always happen when I ignore my gut. I am in a dark place because I know the drill. The cycle comes full circle when I confirm what I already know. And I know I've said this all before maybe using different words. And I did make the calls, see the doctors, have the tests and nothing was found. And when I say nothing, it was NOT nothing, just not detectable yet. My body or maybe my mind senses it long before it can be viewed with tests. Then months go by and I push it out of my mind praying that they are right. I try and succeed to convince myself that this time I am wrong. But I only succeed for a little while. During this time I LIVE for today. Then I get flooded with the dreams and the cycle comes full circle with the last step of confirmation. I know that they'll find it because they will see it now. I only hope I have the strength........................................................

Hockey update

Since we won Saturday's game we advanced to the next round. Today we versed Natick and lost 3-0 and I am OK with this. Natick played a very good and clean game and was just as deserving to win. Besides that, their parents were not annoying whatsoever. You can usually tell by what the parents are screaming to their kids what kind of players they are. From what I hear, whoever won todays game advances to the states in March.

Love and light,

Wendy

Bad news but good!

I can't believe how happy I feel to share that they found something wrong with me. I just got my mail and my results from the TPO AB test came in. This is the antibody test that was still pending.

The normal range is from 0.0 to 20.0 and my levels are at 3,794.0

These elevated levels indicate that there is some degree of inflammation of my thyroid gland. Some people may not show signs until the routine thyroid tests become abnormal but some do, like me. I am a very sensitive person. I know the doctors were a little leary giving me the meds at first but the letter states that as a result of this test they feel it is very appropriate to take the meds as planned. Also included in the letter was precriptions for 2 other meds that I need to begin.

So while I hate the idea of having to take meds on a daily basis I am thrilled to know that my body does talk to me, knows when something is wrong and it's not all in my head! There's nothing worse than doubting yourself!!!!!!!!

This morning started out with an early morning (playdown) hockey game at the New England Sports Center in Marlborough. Justin plays for Nashoba and they versed Framingham, who by the way is a very dirty team. I was very pleased with the refs because they caught many of Framingham's penalites. These are the types of games that drive my adrenaline through the roof because I truly fear for our players getting seriously injured from a dirty hit. From listening to the parents of the other team they encourage this behavior (anything to win). Play smart they would yell (mostly moms) and that can be translated into -hit as dirty as you can but be careful not to get caught. It took all my strength not to throw one of the moms over the balcony onto the ice. Usually I don't mind of we lose all long as the boys play the best they can but the other parents were such arrogant as**s that I never wanted us to win more! And we DID WIN by one goal! Justin scored from the blue line!! This is how my day began and my day continues to be fantastic!

That's all for now.

Love and light~

Wendy

Update

It just occured to me that I never posted my results and updates from my doctor's visits. My Neurologist sent me for an MRI of the brain and it came back normal. I may have posted this part already.

I went to see a new Endocrinologist and she ordered the usual bloodwork but added another test for some anitibody which tells you if you're prone to Thyroid imbalances. This doctor was a fellow so at the end of the visit she would call in the doctor who oversees her findings. I liked both doctors very much and I think I communicated effectively that I am suffering and will find someone who can help me if they were unable.

The main doc actually surprised me when she suggested that I start on very low dose Synthroid even if my bloodwork comes out normal. This is huge because there are so few doctors that would even consider this! They gave me a RX and the next day called to say the routine bloodwork was normal and the antibody was not back yet. I can start taking the meds and follow up with them in January when I am back to have my bone density test. One thing they mentioned is that the blood test can vary depending on what time of day it's given. I never knew that. While going over my symptoms she commented that I have what sounds like a classic textbook case of Hypothyroidism. It's so odd how my bloodwork is normal yet I have every single symptom! I am baffled. But I am so happy that they are willing to work with me and give these meds a try.

I have my CT scan at the end of the month and follow up with the Oncologist for results the first week of December.

My dog is pouting for some affection so until next time~

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!

Swept them up.....WE DID IT!! Justin told me he saw us winning game four with a score of 4-1 so I was a little freaked out until CO scored 2 more runs. Key moments when Ellsbury made that catch at the wall and Kielty hitting the last home run. What a game!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pictured here is the official MVP and the man who sealed the deal. Also pictured is my daughter who has voiced her demand to re-sign Lowell and ixnay on the A-rod farce.