Wendy Lerman Blog

An addendum to the website http://www.wendylerman.com

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Little bit of everything

Today I am not in a bad mood whatsoever. I feel optimistic yet I have the urge to vocalize or vent some things solely for the purpose of letting it out, letting it go, so that I can fully enjoy the remainder of this day.

In the past few days it seems like the same scenario keeps happening. I will go to use, eat or drink something and discover that we are out of it. Most times I will not know this until I open said item and find it empty. So the last person to finish said item off just leaves it there. Doesn’t tell me, leave a note, or even leave the empty container on the counter so that I know we are out. Or better yet, when said item is low, communicate it to me. I am not a mind reader and I can’t keep track of everything. I dislike running out of something that I count on. It must be OCD

I don’t drink soda very often. Even when I do, I almost never finish what I poured. When I do decide to treat myself to some, the cap is almost always barely on and the soda is flat. I find that inconsiderate and something that lacks basic common sense. I guess I don’t have the patience for people who lack common sense. Like closing the door to the bathroom (fine) but leaving the light on? How many times I stood waiting to use it only to find that nobody was in there the whole time! Can’t even to begin to list the reasons why I so desperately want (and always wanted) to live somewhere that had more than one bathroom. I go out of my mind when I get stuck on these thoughts and I can’t help it OCD again

Yes the theme here is OCD. I have it. I wish I didn’t because there is always some struggle I have to face because of it. Thank goodness I don’t have a severe form of this disorder but to me, it feels pretty severe. But I try very hard to keep it under control. I know I can be difficult at times and I am truly sorry for it, but it’s also not something I will take blame for anymore because I cannot help it. It’s part of me and should not be taken personally I truly have nothing but loving intentions regardless of how I may come across That’s the God’s honest truth my friends.

A little while ago I had to put things away above my reach and I thought of something that I find cute yet sad. The other day I needed to reach something beyond my reach and I said to my 13 yr old daughter “Monkey, I need you for a sec”. And she obliged and retrieved the item for me and then said “I wish you wouldn’t call me that”. Not too long ago she was on a big “monkey” kick. Monkey everything. She even told people she was a monkey. Now she doesn’t want any part of it. She is growing up I love it and hate it all at the same time.

I just had a birthday this month can you tell?

On to healthwise.

Last week I was able to get a long overdue appointment with my Dermatologist. Follow-up/yearly check for past Melanomas. I got the all clear. Yay!!!

On April 13th I am having both a resting and exercise Echocardiogram. April 19th I am having both my PET scan and CT scans done. April 21 will be an EKG and visit to the Cardiologist and on May 5th is the visit to my Oncologist. I will post updates and any info as I get it.

On the book front, haven’t made too much progress, or as much as I wished. I do my best work late night into the wee hours of the morning when the world is quiet and I can be in my own head. I can’t achieve this and function to drive a school bus at 6:45 AM. Not safe for the children. But school vacation is coming up in a few weeks! I am rearing to go

Tonight I have a date with my honey. We are meeting his daughter and friend in town and then taking in a Celtic’s game. I can’t wait

Have a wonderful day (everyday) !

Love and light,

Wendy

posted by Unknown @ 3:10 PM

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